He’s called Alonso!

You knew it wouldn’t take long for me to pass comment on Christmas Day’s ‘Doctor bloody Who’ episode ‘Voyage Of The Damned’, didn’t you? Yeah, ‘course you did. So here we go.

First of all, right from the outset, we have a new beefed-up score that I have to say, I rather liked. Nowt wrong wi the old one, but this new one’s pretty fab too. Staying wi music for a moment, I noticed a lot of ‘This Is Gallifrey: Our Childhood, Our Home’ touches from series three in there. Lovely. And again for the series four teaser trailer tacked ont end – was that the infamous ‘running music’ ‘Futurekind’, also from series three? Certainly seemed that way – and it were fab. So is the coming series, if that trailer is owt to go by.

So then. Bits that made me go ‘yay!’:

A degree in Earthonomics? Inspired. Can I get me one of them? Sounds exotic. And the ship that speaks with a Welsh accent, that were a nice touch. The little “hello sailor!” as the Doctor gets in touch with Midshipman Frame. The lovely melodious voice of The Host that says: “Information: You’re all going to die” in such a nice way (that rather strangely reminded me of an Ood...). The “Don’t get spiky with me!” from the Doctor – and his earlier “Down on Earth he’s a talking conker!”. The “You might be a Time King from Gally Bee but you still need to eat” from Astrid. Wee Bannakaffalatta flashing his bits to knock out The Host – cos if he did that int park, you just know he’d get arrested. And wee Astrid having to stand ont box to reach the Doctor – oh how we howled, seeing as we’d been talking about that beforehand. The rather resigned “unsinkable, that’s me” from the Doctor. The ‘M – M – M – Max’ joke (Capricorn, not Headroom). ‘The Apprentice’ jokes, the “It’s not Great France and Great Germany – only Britain is great” gag, the whole ‘Poseidon Adventure’ thing they had going on, and so much more I’ll remember later when I watch it again (no doubt).

Bits that made me go ‘squee!’:

Midshipman Frame – he’s called Alonso! Alonso! How fab was that? After all the argy-bargy over the whole ‘allons-y vs. and-onsy’ argument, and then me collapsing completely once it were proved he did do the whole “And then it'd be really brilliant if I met someone called Alonso, cos then I could say ‘allons-y Alonso’, every time!”… Astrid’s “Please let me come with you” speech, the Doctor’s In-Your-Face “I’m a 903 year old Time Lord” speech, quite rightly telling him why he was in charge, and just so many bits.

Bits that made me go ‘hmm’:

Purr wee Davey Doctor. Cut adrift again, all by his lonesome, and then whack, not ten minutes later he’s found some other bird as wants to see the stars with him. If he objects to being kissed and mauled so much, why doesn’t he just find a lesbian or a straight bloke to ship out with? And losing Foon and Morvin – I were quite upset that Foon chucked herself off like that, but then again, what else did anyone expect her to do? And she did make damned sure she took one of the buggers with her, so she’s already a hero in my book. Astrid was pretty ok, although I’m wondering what the fuss was all about, really. Apart from Kylie turning up in Kinky Boots, that is, which I am patiently assured by my male friends that they made all the difference to the episode. Certainly made a difference to their attention levels, anyway. Just like that tux of the Doctor’s concentrates the female mind, I shouldn’t wonder. Anyway, she did a fab job of what she were given though, as I were confident she would do. Still sucks that they couldn’t bring her back, but then again, it were a good thing they couldn’t, or it would have been a little too neat and happy an ending for me.

I was impressed with the acting all round this time. Bernard Cribbins – excellent. I did like Mr Copper, thought he was ace, and I did rather have a soft spot for Midshipman Alonso Frame – just cos he maximum-deadlocked himself in, knowing he’d been shot but finding it the only way. Didn’t he hold on for an amazingly long time with with nasty bullet-wound in his side? What a trooper…

This must all be a walk in the park for David Tenninch Tennant by now, but he still pulls all the right faces and brings all the right voices and touches to it. He’s still managing to make the Doctor look enthused by everything but jaded by personal experiences, and that’s never going to get old with me.

Max Capricorn – seen the end of him, have we? Really? Looked a little familiar, that baldy, pasty-faced half-android type. Reminded me of someone else, but I just can’t put me little Dalek sink-plunger on it… Nah, I’m sure he’s done for. I’m sure he’s been wiped out. I’m absolutely sure he’s not coming back as an arch-enemy to revive a bunch of ancient evil genocidal genetically altered space-stalking salt shakers. Not at all.

(Just to be a complete English geek – we had an argument at school last week over how a ‘salt cellar’ was actually a dish, and the proper term for the standy-uppy Dalek-shaped version is actually a ‘salt shaker’. I thought it were a salt cellar. I lost.)

Anyway, moving on… I reckon that wiseass that won all the money on stocks is going to make a comeback at some stage, or at least gets mentioned. I hope he loses it all in some horrid Black Friday affair. We can but hope.

Looks like I’m done here. All of it were fab, double fab, and an extra pint of fab fert weekend. If I could have changed one thing, it would have been Foon and Morvin getting rescued. Ah well. Can’t have everything.

So this means we’re on fer series four now, in what, April next year? Bring it on. For now, it’s peach and lube all round.

Tags:
BBC ~ Doctor Who ~ David Tennant ~ Kylie Minogue ~ Titanic ~ Bernard Cribbins ~ Daleks ~ Bannakaffalatta