Conversations of the week

Student: Teacher, I saw a toy of Mr Potato, and he was a Transformer!
Me: Mr Potato Head? Oh - Optimash Prime, right? With a red and blue head?
Student: Yes! It is so cool - I want one.
Me: Do you know they make others, too? Like Darth Tater?
Student: Darth Vader?
Me: It’s a Mr Potato Head but he’s wearing Darth Vader’s black helmet, yes.
Student: Waa! And some more?
Me: They make others, like Artoo Potatoo and an Indiana Jones. I’m sure they must make tonnes of other cool ones, but I don’t know what they are.
Student: They could make… Doctor Who!
Me: What, and call him ‘Doctor Spud’?
Student: What mean ‘spud’?
Me: Potato.
Student: Oh. No, they can make Dalek Spud! Like a Mr Potato but no leg, only the big dalek thing - skirt.
Me: I like it! And a melty Davros face!
Student: Yes! And he no have a gun, just a kitchen thing that takes off potato skin!
Me: *rolling around with laughter*
Student: And a new toy - a Terminator spud!
Me: A Spudinator?
Student: Yes! With a bite hole for no eye and a red light there, like the old movie!
Me: *speechless with laughter*

Student: Teacher, I saw a comic and it had zombies.
Me: Cool. What was it about?
Student: Well… There have some people, and they are munched on, and they are now zombies.
Me: ‘Munched on’? *rolls round laughing* Munched on. Yeah, I like that. Munched on. Sorry, carry on.
Student: But I don’t know one thing.
Me: What’s that?
Student: Well if a zombie you can kill it with squishing his brain, what happen if a zombie attacks the man and eats his brain? Does he becomes a zombie?
Me: That would be hard with no brain. No, I don’t think he does.
Student: Oh, ok. So… how do you know if you eat the brain?
Me: Oh conkers - brain, ice-cream, brain, ice-cream - I always get those two mixed up.
Student: *laughs* No no no - what does a brain looks like?
Me: Like a brain.
Student: But like what?
Me: Uhm… scrambled egg. In grey.
Student: Oh.
Me: What?
Student: McDonald’s scrambled egg? Or real scrambled egg my mother makes?
Me: [Moment where I control myself and try not to laugh] I think probably real scrambled egg. McDonald’s scrambled egg isn’t really…
Student: Scrambled?
Me: Exactly. Yeah, definitely homemade scrambled egg.
Student: Then I don’t want breakfast.
Me: You could have boiled eggs.
Student: *quietly, thoughtfully* They look something like octopus eyes.
Me: And?
Student: I don’t want to eat eyes.
Me: You eat fish eyes, right?
Student: Sometimes.
Me: Same-same. But larger.
Student: Oh yeah.

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