That was a big ol’ gob of spit!


[Apologies for the ‘Super-bloody-natural’ Sam Winchester season two gag reel joke int title, but it just kinda summed up how I were feeling when I were much too over-excited to speak earlier.]

This post is a big hyowj massive fuck-off “ah-haaaaaaaaaaa!” vindicated-Bill Murray-in-Scrooged in so many ways.

First off, and let’s be honest, it’s the writer VS. Hollywood thing. Obviously I’m wi the writers on this one. I’m vain enough to think that in a few years’ time I might be publishing fiction novels under a pseudonym, so obviously I’m thinking all writers, whatever career path or however they sell their shite, should be looked after, paid for their efforts, given due royalties and basically treated like the saviours of the entertainment world that they are. ‘Nuff said. So it’s no surprise that I laffed me arse off (and completely agreed with) Jack Black and his Tenacious D act at the Writer’s Guild of America rally thing, which you can take a squiz at over here. And if you missed all the hoo-ha and wonder what in fucking hell everyone is so upset about, take a look at this. It’ll set you right. Reason To Squee No. 1: Hollywood brass brought to their knees and Golden Globes ceremony cancelled? Fucking ace! That’s telling them!

Reason To Squee No. 2: A personal victory, long time int making, very very infinitesimal time int bringing about – far be it fer me to expound on personal shite as shouldn’t be included in an obviously so not impersonal blog, but I have to show you my victory dance. It goes at follows:
Wait, wait. Back up. Stand up from yer keyboard / mouse arrangement. Right. Move the monitor so you can see it from where you are now. There we go. Right, now imagine me doing the old circular Running Man routine, coupled by a big “huh!” Johnny Bravo stylee to finish it off. Nice, dontcha thing? Kinda like that Cyberman in the series two ‘Doctor bloody Who’ boxed set DVD outtakes. You know, the one int park. Yeah, like that. Anyway, why am I so made-up? I can’t say. But suffice to say, it’s fucking ace and I’m still dancing round me bedroom right now.

Reason To Squee No. 3: Add to this, the fact that a rather young but ‘Doctor bloody Who’ mad student at work (who may or – ahem – may not have been influenced by me) told me, very amazingly Doctor Ten stylee, that if you put too many magnets on yer fridge right where the side doings are, it fucks up the workings. Yep. Five years old and already concerned with how a great big box fits inside a smaller one (cue lots of ‘see this small block, and now you hold this big one and I’ll show you how it works’ discussions), he lays on me the most influential and helpful piece of info since I stopped int Mac shop determined not to buy one. Yeah, he’s right. Purr wee Frankie (our fridge) has not been a happy bunny for a while now, and we were contemplating getting an engineer in to see if he had to be taken away to the big fridge shit heap in the sky. Yeah, it were that bad. Then wee Student tells me this big secret and we shift all the bastard magnets as have been cluttering purr wee Frankie’s sides.

You know what’s coming next, right? Yeah. Purr wee Frankie the Fridge wi a defrost-cyle problem reverts to Frankie the Super-Fridge, and all’s right wi the defrosting / chilling cycle world. Bloody marvellous, as you might agree. Hundreds of dollars of engineers, call-outs, replacements and several nerve-endings of stress have been avoided. Bless you students, for you are the future.

Reason To Squee No. 4: Then I got tired of arsing around wi Mavis (me mobile phone) and decided to retrofit my Mac Mini (a first-generation 1.25 Ghz PPC G4) wi Bluetooth. No, stop it, hold on – don’t ask why I didn’t just get Bluetooth on it when I bought it – it’s a fucking long story. Anyway, did a little research and apparently a wee D-Link DBT-120 version B2 or later dongle would do the trick. Went to the Wan Chai computer centre (the one by the 24-hour McDonald’s, near the Southorn Playground) and found an equivalent – an Omiz Bluetooth V2.0 + EDR adaptor (dongle). Fucking ace – if yer on Mac, ignore the hyowj fuck-off installation CD and assorted shite as int package. Just plug it into yer Mac’s USB port (or yer USB hub – that’s mine, int shape of a TARDIS ~ how fab is that!), give it a second and then go to ‘Finder’ int top toolbar. Slide down to ‘Services’ then ‘Send file to Bluetooth device’, and yer away. You have to validate the device it finds the first time you use it o course. After that it were ‘hello, new ringtone!’ (The Steve Carlson Band’s Wasted Jamie, featuring the delicious Jensen Ackles and his particular talent for backing vocals) and ‘hello new wallpaper!’ (one of my most recent Winchester Wallpapers – the one featuring both Dean Winchester and the Impala – double phwoooooaaarr!).

Then Reason To Squee No. 5: Long-lost mate arrives back in Hongkie Toon and calls me out of the blue to treat me to yam cha on Sunday morning, seeing as it’s me birthday an’ all Friday. Not so bothered about the free breakfast / brunch, more excited and totally fucking stoked cos I’ve not seen her in literally eighteen months. We have so much ground to cover, so much gossip to go over, so many in-jokes and stupid stories to catch up on, it’s unreal. It’s going to be another three-hour yam cha, I can see it coming. Just like the good old days! Bring it on!

And not really a reason to squee… Oh alright, yes it is! So then Reason To Squee No. 6: Won a few rounds at’ pub quiz, and overall winners too, so won a coupla bottles of red wine, two rounds of lemon-ish shooters (woo-hoo!) and a bottle of champagne. All o which we necked. Got home, re-watched Friday Night Poject wi David Tenninch Tennant (‘there’s been a murder!’) and then John Barrowman (‘well look who’s famous now, girl!’) while imbibing copious amounts of Purple Nurples. A great night was had all-round I think…

That’s it then. Life’s pretty good right now… Just have to buy a new bed at some point so I can finally stop being an insomniac and also stop finding shite to do so as I don’t have to sleep on the crappy excuse for a bunk that I have right now.

Soopytwist everyone!

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2 'aye's:

FOUR DINNERS said...

A Tardis shaped Hub???? Supurb!!!!

You sound well happy 'n all. Good stuff....

Got some good mobiley answer messages Mavis would appreciate.

When me mum rings the phone chants -

"She's fat, she's round, she bounces on the ground, it's yer muuuum, it's yer muuuuum"

Wifey rings -

"(Air raid siren) WARNING WARNING,,,IT'S THE WIFE!!"

and the best of all -

The genuine BT female voice if you don't pick up.

"I'm sorry, (Fred) is not available right now as he is having a wank. Please leave a message after the tone"

weenie said...

I got myself a Tardis moneybox - there's not a lot in it at the moment!

BTW, Happy Birthday!